Separation From Śrīla Prabhupāda (Śrī Prabhupāda Viraha)

It is seen in the conversation with Śrī Rāmānanda:

duḥkha-madhye kona duḥkha haya gurutara
kṛṣṇa-bhakta-viraha vinā duḥkha nāhi dekhi para

Among all sorrows, I see no suffering more severe than separation from a devotee of Kṛṣṇa. (Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Madhya-līlā 8.248)

Compared to relatives connected merely to the body, separation from those who are related to the ātmā brings much more suffering. This is because feelings connected to the pure conscious ātmā are naturally far stronger than feelings connected to material relationships. And when such feelings become further connected with the supremely transcendental and most sweet relationship with Śrī Kṛṣṇa, it achieves extraordinary depth and rises to an overwhelming intensity.

The unparalleled and extraordinary nature of Śrīla Dāsa Gosvāmī Prabhu’s feeling of separation is something which is most inconceivable. In separation from Śrī Rādhikā, the original āśraya-vigraha, he is prepared even to neglect the service of Śrī Kṛṣṇa. Furthermore, in separation from his most intimate Gurudeva, Śrī Rūpa Gosvāmī, his feelings and anguished utterances make one’s head spin – an emotional expression which is revolutionary within the world of bhakti.

vyāghra-tuṇḍāyate kuṇḍaṁ girīndro ajagarāyate
śūnyāyate mahā-goṣṭhaṁ śrī-rūpa-virahena me

Now that I no longer have the preserver of my life, the land of Vraja has become desolate, Govardhana Hill has become like a great serpent, and Rādhā-kuṇḍa appears like the gaping mouth of a ferocious tiger. (Prārthanāśraya-caturdaśaka, verse 11)

When one contemplates the meaning of this śloka, one becomes stunned! Śrī Rādhā-kuṇḍa, who is non-different from Śrī Rādhikā, and whom he accepted exclusively as his sole shelter upon receiving the nectar of Śrī Rūpa’s instructions – and govardhana-śilā, placed in his hands by Śrīman Mahāprabhu Himself, whom he constantly served as the very Lord of his life, bathing it always with tears of love while incessantly praying, nija nikaṭa nivāsaṁ dehi govardhana tvam (‘O Govardhana! Grant me residence near you’) – that very Rādhā-kuṇḍa and that very Girirāja appear to him today like the gaping mouth of a tiger and like a python coming to swallow him, in separation from his guru Śrī Rūpa.

From the above-mentioned delirium of separation, we (in our own position) may achieve a glimpse of what kind of grave sorrow should arise in separation from Śrī Guru. By the mercy of Śrīla Dāsa Gosvāmī Prabhu, when will we become able to attain such anguished sincerity in separation from the lotus feet of Śrī Guru? May this alone be our sole prayer amidst all attempts at service on the day of separation from the lotus feet of Śrī Guru.

The experience of separation from Śrī Kṛṣṇa and kārśna (the devotee of Kṛṣṇa) is a particular state of supreme bliss found in the self. Though externally it seems sorrowful, internally it is full of supreme bliss. We should remember the words of Kavirāja Gosvāmī:

bāhye viṣa-jvālā haya, bhitare ānanda-maya,
kṛṣṇa-premāra adbhuta carita

Externally it burns like poison, and internally it is full of bliss. Such is the wondrous character of kṛṣṇa-prema. (Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Madhya-līlā 2.50)

“Our sweetest songs are those that tell of saddest things.”
(Percy Bysshe Shelley – ‘To a Skylark’)

(Translated by Swami Bhaktivijñāna Giri)

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